The pursuit of happiness is a universal struggle. We all want to be happy, but…
At this time of year many of us are looking at our lives and thinking about a fresh start. Whether you’re facing a new chapter, looking to gain some closure or just want to refresh your life, the below tips can help.
Close This Chapter
All new beginnings follow some kind of end. This can be an emotional experience for many people. Whether you’re leaving a relationship, a job or a home it can be hard to say goodbye and move on with your life. However, once you’ve made the choice to move on it’s best to do it as quickly and cleanly as possible to minimise disruption and upset.
Whatever situation you’re leaving behind try to set a date for the change and stick to it. It probably won’t all happen in one day but setting yourself a clear deadline can help you start your journey onwards. Grieve if you need to and take the time to say goodbye, but then go and don’t look back. Tell yourself this change is for the best and keep with you some kind of motivator or list of reasons you’ve decided you need this fresh start.
Try not to look back or hold on to any mementos. Don’t spend your time wondering “what if” but instead plan for your future. If negative events in your past are holding you back, deal with these first. Take appropriate responsibility for any mistakes, then forgive yourself. Try and make amends with anyone you’ve hurt then let go of the guilt. If someone has wronged you, you may find it therapeutic to face them and explain how you feel, then let go of resentments and move on. Dealing with traumatic past events can be difficult alone but I have helped many clients using hypnotherapy to find freedom and enjoy a fresh start.
Plan For Change
Many of my clients know they want a fresh start but aren’t sure where to begin. Through Life Coaching, I help them revaluate their life, values and priorities and decide what path they will pursue. Here are a few steps that could help you do the same:
Examine your existing life – what are you happy with and what will you change?
Imagine your perfect life – how will you spend your time? What will you surround yourself with?
Determine your values – what is most important to you?
Assess your relationships – which are good for you and which are harmful?
Determine motivation – what motivates you to get up in the morning?
Set goals – what do you want to change and how will you do it?
Become more proactive – how will you keep yourself accountable for progress?
Cultivate passion – are there any passions or hobbies you can develop further?
The overall goal is to decide who you want to be, then learn how to be that person. By refocusing your life and efforts on what makes you happy, you can achieve a true fresh start.
Take The Leap
Once you’ve made the change, commit to it fully. If you feel yourself being drawn back there are a few things you can try to keep yourself motivated.
Stay off social networks for a while as these can often drag you back to your old self or situation. Concentrate on yourself and your own wellbeing. Sometimes seemingly minor things like a change of scenery or change of appearance can have a hugely positive effect on our sense of self and overall outlook. Keep yourself relaxed and healthy during the time of change with a proper diet, sleep and exercise, as well as allowing yourself enough time to relax and enjoy yourself.
Give yourself space to change and be kind to yourself. If you do have a stumble, forgive yourself, learn from it and move on. Focus on new hobbies, friends or work and keep motivated. Eventually your new life and behaviours will become second nature and you will feel a lot more comfortable. If you start to struggle, try taking some time out to help others through volunteering projects or helping a friend – looking outwards and thinking about others often realigns our own self views.
And above all, enjoy your new life. It might not always be easy at first but you chose this for a reason. Change can be difficult but it also yields great rewards.
If you’d like to learn more about how I can help you make a fresh start or support you during a time of change please don’t hesitate to get in touch.