Anger is a natural emotion but it’s important that we can control it. When anger becomes out of control we can hurt ourselves and others, damaging relationships, work or our personal life. We all feel anger to different degrees and have different levels of resilience when it comes to controlling emotions and handling stress. Excessive anger can lead to relationship problems, depression and alcohol problems.
Recognise the onset
Although anger is sparked by psychological processes the early signs of anger are often physical. You can teach yourself to recognise the symptoms of this chemical process so you can take action before your anger explodes. These signs include tense muscles, increased heart rate, headache or stomach ache, sweating or shaking and dizziness.
There are other emotions that you experience alongside anger so recognising and getting help for these may lessen your anger issues. These might include difficulty with conflict, defensiveness, communication problems, depression, guilt, resentment or anxiety.
Depending on your individual situation there may be certain things that trigger your anger. Perhaps it’s your relationship with a specific person, being in a certain environment or being put in a difficult situation. These triggers often relate to past experiences when you’ve felt unfairly treated or threatened. For example, if you were verbally abused or harshly dealt with as a child, the slightest confrontation or assertion from a figure of authority may trigger this old anger to rise up. Dealing with these unresolved issues will help you control your anger. I have helped many clients deal with issues like this.
Learn coping techniques
Removing yourself from triggers where possible is an effective short term solution but it still puts limits on your everyday life. You might also try techniques that allow you to avoid an outburst in the moment such as positive assertions, relaxation techniques, deep breathing, mindfulness and progressive muscle relaxation. Counting to ten is also effective – taking more time to respond rather than reacting in the moment allows you to calm down a little first.
Change your outlook
Our cognitive responses can be rewired or changed to react differently. Instead of experiencing anger we can train ourselves to laugh at difficult situations or see the positive side of it. Gaining some perspective on minor hindrances or set-backs can help to relieve anger. Applying reason to our thoughts takes practice but it can be done, and soon becomes second nature.
I have helped many clients learn how to manage anger and gain control of their own behaviour again. I can help you understand your triggers and develop coping, relaxation and communication strategies. In addition, hypnotherapy can help you uncover and deal with the underlying causes of your anger which is the best way to deal with anger for good.
If you’d like to learn more about how I can help please do get in touch.