It’s the classic answer to that difficult interview question…’what’s your biggest weakness?’. Many people answer this way because they secretly see perfectionism as a strength, or at least as a less severe weakness.
However, the truth is that a real obsession with perfectionism can be crippling. It makes us feel like failures, sucks the joy from our lives and accomplishments and causes us to undermine our own potential.
What is Perfectionism?
Perfectionism is the need to ensure that in almost every facet of a person’s life, everything is perfect. Perfectionists strive to always get things right, however, as is well documented, this can have a detrimental affect on a person, and can stop them from getting started on new things, if they feel they are not up to the task.
What’s the Problem with Perfectionism?
When perfectionists make what they see as mistakes, this can lead to frustration, shame, guilt and procrastination. Research shows that perfectionistic tendencies have been linked to a huge list of clinical issues: depression, anxiety, social anxiety disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, eating disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder,chronic fatigue syndrome, insomnia, hoarding and even early mortality and suicide. A perfectionist tends to wholly focus on the negatives, be overly self critical, potentially risk adverse and unable to forgive themselves for ‘failure’. Even when the task was near-impossible in the first place. The feeling of never quite having completed a task to their satisfaction can leave a person with an overwhelming sense of disappointment as well as other negative emotions.
Media and the Desire to be Perfect
Perfectionism is on the rise. These tendencies are spotted in people of all ages – children, adolescents and adults. Modern media, beauty standards and ‘Instagram’ culture can fuel this drive in people. It’s so easy to take the perfection we see in the media as a standard for ourselves but these snapshots are not real and are unachievable.
Why Mistakes are Important
Mistakes are how we learn and grow. The most successful people are not those who don’t make any mistakes. In fact, successful people don’t tend to be risk adverse. They take risks and if things don’t work out exactly as planned, they learn from this experience. These life experiences are key to growth.
What Causes Perfectionism?
The question is why does an individual feel the need to ensure that the task that they are undertaking is done perfectly? For many people simply achieving the task itself is enough, however, for those who have an issue with perfectionism, that is simply not enough. There are normally underlying reasons in the psyche of the individual that fuels the desire for the perfect outcome. These can be related to deep-rooted issues from childhood or painful criticism that may have occurred in the past. Whatever the reason, the fact remains that perfectionism is an unhealthy frame of mind, and in reality needs to be addressed, otherwise the person will live a life of almost perpetual unhappiness as they struggle to constantly achieve perfection
Hypnotherapy for Perfectionism
Hypnotherapy is often used successfully for this kind of problem. The reason it works so well is that it enables a trained therapist to delve into the psychological make up of the person to find the root cause. Once this is determined, then a suitable course of action to remedy the issue can then be arranged. Determining the cause requires skilled questioning and reviews of answers to ascertain the problem, and is best carried out by an advanced hypnotherapist.
Can perfectionism ever be a good thing? Of course it can! When perfectionism is ‘healthy’ it isn’t the overriding driver. People with a healthy dose of perfectionism tend to have high standards, discipline and good motivation. However, they can also be positive, take risks and view the world with a balanced eye. Hypnotherapy can help you turn your problem perfectionism into a more beneficial attribute.
Your Next Steps
If you feel like you have an unhealthy perfectionist drive then please do get in touch. I can help you find a new outlook and feel free of these controlling and negative feelings. Why not get in touch for a free, no-obligation consultation to discuss your situation? I can offer sessions in my London hypnotherapy clinic or via online hypnotherapy – the choice is yours.
My techniques guarantee that you remain in control at every session. These techniques, developed over 25 years, are so effective that many issues can be addressed in as little as three sessions and my location in the very heart of London means you can book sessions to work around work.
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