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Overcoming Shyness In Dating

Overcoming Shyness In Dating

There are many reasons why people struggle with shyness in dating. Shy people with social anxiety or low self-esteem and confidence issues can find dating very difficult. You may never have felt able to successfully date or perhaps you’ve just come out of a long relationship and are feeling lost, not knowing where to start. Sometimes traumatic past experiences can leave us feeling helpless or unsure how to proceed.

The issues behind shyness and dating can be varied and are often very effectively treated with hypnotherapy.

Hypnotherapy For Confidence In Dating

Hypnotherapy is an ideal treatment for dating shyness. This safe, effective treatment helps you resolve inner conflicts, face your fears and build confidence and positivity. It can help you quickly re-evaluate and address any negative beliefs and replace them with new powerful affirmations. My treatments help clients feel safe, secure and comfortable with the idea of dating, turning a fear into a new source of excitement.

To get you started, here are some initial tips for overcoming shyness and finding dating success.

Understand The Cause

What is at the root of your shyness? Is it low self-esteem, fear of intimacy or perhaps a past trauma?

Dealing with the root cause is the best way to start to rebuild your confidence.

Choose The Type Of Dating That’s Right For You

Some people feel more comfortable in group situations so they might try group activities or speed dating events. Others find this anxiety inducing and will prefer a one to one meeting. The internet is a very useful tool for shy people to start dating but try not to become too reliant on the anonymity it offers – the end goal is to feel comfortable meeting in person.

Focus On The Process, Not the Outcome

Putting too much pressure on yourself or the outcome of a date is not helpful. Successful daters learn to enjoy the process. It can still be fun to spend time with someone, even when you know it’s not going to progress into anything more. Cultivate interest in people and their lives. Think about questions to ask and learn to listen. Offer interesting information about yourself in return. There may be rejection along the way but don’t take it personally – accept that some things just don’t work out.

Build Your Confidence

People tend to be attracted to authentic and confident people. This doesn’t mean that you have to be extremely outgoing or brash, but an inner sense of self-worth will portray a quiet sureness. Focus on your good points and speak positive affirmations to yourself. Do things for yourself that build your own happiness. Many people lead into dating by starting new classes or activities. This is a great way to practise socialising in a low pressure environment and definitely builds confidence.

Don’t Overthink

Staying in the moment makes dating much more enjoyable. Getting stuck in your own head or negative thought patterns can be very damaging. Don’t second guess what other people are thinking, remain open and in the moment. Accept that there are some people who will play games or who may treat you badly – it’s best to just move on quickly from these situations and spend some time with friends and family that you trust for rest bite. The majority of people are good, trustworthy people who probably have many of the same hopes and fears as you.


Further Help

If you’d like help with shyness or dating please do get in touch to learn more.

Alix Needham

My techniques guarantee that you remain in control at every session. These techniques, developed over 25 years, are so effective that many issues can be addressed in as little as three sessions and my location in the very heart of London means you can book sessions to work around work.

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